Apa yang kita dah buat?

Dua tiga hari lepas, ada kawan cite pasal satu blog yang bagus.  Bila dah baca, memang terkesan di hati.  Blog orang biasa, bukan ustaz bukan guru agama. Cuma orang biasa yang saya rasa rajin membaca.  Banyak ilmu dan  mind trigger things yang dia bincang kat situ. Dengan cara yang buat orang tertarik untuk baca. Dia jugak ada banyak follower. 

Sebagai blog walker and stalker yang berjaya, saya rasa blog yang ramai follower ni biasanya blog yang santai-santai je.  Jarang yang saya tengok, blog yang discuss isu berat ada ramai follower.  Tentu ada sesuatu psl blog atau blogger ni kan?

Tapi bukan itu yang saya nak cite kat sini.  Saya terfikir, dia orang biasa, saya pun orang biasa.  Kalau satu hari nanti dia dah takde, dan bila ditanya nanti..semasa hayat dia...apa amal baik yang dia dah buat?  Dia boleh jawab, dia dah cuba sampaikan dakwah dan ajak orang buat baik melalui blog dia.  Dia sekurang-kurangnya dah buat 2700 jiwa terfikir untuk berubah.

Kalau saya pulak? Kalau saya dah takde nanti, bila ditanya apa sumbangan saya pada agama...apa saya nak jawab?  Takde? None?

Tadi pulak, bukak facebook dan terbaca link classmate pasal remaja yang mati dalam usaha allahyarham berdakwah di Sabah.  Siap guna duit PTPTN dia untuk dakwah. Jenazah nampak tenang, macam tido je.

Dalam mana-mana kes kat atas ni, dua-dua pun sebenarnya berdakwah.  Ajak orang kembali kepada agama.    Dorang pun orang biasa macam saya. 

Saya rasa takut.  Saya rasa kerdil. Saya rasa takde makna. Takde nilai. Camne?

Doa saya, semoga Allah panjangkan umur saya...beri kesempatan untuk saya sumbangkan sesuatu dulu.  Amin.

1 Ramadhan - datang dan pergi...

Post ni kira lewat sehari..alang-alang dh lewat, saya update sekali lah.

Pertama sekali, SELAMAT HARI LAHIR YANG KE 61 UNTUK EMAK SAYA.  

Saya doakan semua perkara baik di dunia ni untuk emak tercinta saya (meh doa ramai-ramai..hehe)

So, kalo ikutkan hari ni double celebration la..memandangkan saya sangat sengkek sekarang, takde hadiah macam selalu untuk Mak. Bawak ke tahun depan lah nampaknye.

Tadi, pergi ziarah kakak kerani sekolah yang baru kehilangan ayahandanya tercinta.  Berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu memikul.  Saya dah lalui, so saya tahu perasaannya.  Kita tahu kita redha, tapi sedih tetap sedih.

Doa saya semoga Kak Nor tabah menghadapi dugaan ni.  Dah semoga Allahyarham tenang di sana (meh sedekah al-fatihah ramai-ramai.. :)

Kepada semua hargailah mak ayah kita semasa hayat mereka masih ada.  Sebabnya kita pun tak tahu, siapa akan pergi dulu.  Hari-hari ada je orang baru lahir.  Hari-hari jugak ada yang akan pergi. Kita? Rahsia Dia juga adanya.  

SELAMAT BERPUASA SEMUA...

SEMOGA RAMADHAN INI LEBIH 

BERMAKNA :)

Note:  Saya ada hajat dan niat yang saya pasang tiap-tiap kali puasa..tapi selalu gagal.  Harap kali ini tidaklah begitu. Amin.

Geram!

How do you feel when you cannot use your broadband when you have paid waaayyyyy before the deadline? 
How do you feel when you have to call their hotline and they put you on hold for 10min and you have to bear the cost?
How do you feel when you have to call them few times only to talk to different operators and they ask you the same question everytime?
How do you feel when you asked for the same operator so that you dont have to repeat your story like 1000 times (ok..exaggerate a bit here) they ask you the operator's ID when they dont even give you their ID earlier on.  How in the world can we tell their ID?
How do you feel when at the end of like 35min of call, you've got no solution and you have to figure things out on your own.
On top of that, they ask you to pay extra RM5 for change of simcard.  Owh..well. Thats the best solution they can give. I'm more than happy to pay.  Good, keep up the good work.  I'm proud to be one of your proud customer.


So, how do you feel?  Geram tak kena baca banyak how do you feel? Hahaha


Mood: Stress! Stress!

Hehehe...pls bear with me!

Jangan marah, dua entry untuk satu malam ni..
Well, sebenaqnya dah pagi ni.
Walaupun mengantuk (dan penat) tapi mata tak boleh nak lelap
So layan radio dengan housemate saya..
Tetiba keluar lagu ni, sape pandai teka laa..
Ini cuma cebisan dari lagu tu saje..hehe


"So today, I finally find the courage deep inside
Just to walk right up to your door
But my body can’t move when I finally get to it
Just like a thousand times before


Well maybe i, I need a little love yeah
And maybe i, I need a little care
And maybe i, maybe you, maybe you, maybe you
Oh you need somebody just to hold you
If you do, just reach out and I’ll be there"

Lagu ni zaman saya skolah dulu kot..

Giler lama..cuma blom masuk ketegori oldies..

Disebabkan mata tak leh lelap, ingat nak layan muvi

ini antara 'ubat tido' saya yang paling mujarab..

kawan-kawan saya dulu siap ade yang betting

berapa lama saya buleh bertahan time tengok muvi.. :D

Tapi sayangnya, pendrive tempat menyimpan muvi tersebut hilang lah pulak

nak tengok online? dalam mimpi saje lah

So, nak buat ape?

Layan mata je la..

lagu malam2 camni memang tak boleh blah.

Hmm..mata makin cerah.

Saya macam teringat kat awak le.

Awak ingat kat saya tak?

Blues untuk aku...

Malam ni memang blues. Apsal? 


Sebab baru balik dari kampung. Tak sempat dok lama kat umah. Sampai pagi sabtu, singgah sana sini...sampai umah dah petang. Tido atas katil sendiri pun tak sempat, cane?  Lain kali balik, sila ingat jangan tertido kat lain selain bilik anda sendiri sebab nanti anda akan terkenang-kenang keempukan katil anda. (walaupun dia tak bape empuk pun).


Sebab walaupun balik umah, hati ada kat Penang.  Lecturer pi sms bagitau nak datang esok (Isnin). So, hati saya segera terbang ke Penang sebab teringat kerja yang melambak yang saya tak bawak balik.  Sebelum ni saya memang selalu bawak balik, tapi saya bawa semula ke sini dengan keadaan tidak terusik...buang karan je.  So kali ni saya nekad tak bawak balik sebab nak cuti je. Result:  Gagal dua-dua, cuti dan kerja.


Sebab saya mencari hati saya...semasa di sana, saya rasa hati saya kat sini. Tapi bila di sini, saya rasa hati saya di sana.  Adakah hati saya masih sangkut di tol Juru tadi? Sebab saya macam tak de hati malam ni... 

My 6 weeks journal...(Jurnal 6 minggu saya)

When i first started, my greatest fear was...the kids. I don't really like kids (or so I thought), so how am I going teach them? The thought of shouting and attending to their gugu gaga wears me out. Just the thought. So how the heck am I going to face them? 200++ days a year? That was my worries. 


I still remember, when asked..why did i choose to become a teacher, my answer was...'its the passion for the language'.  I love my years learning english and i want to share that with others.  When I told my sister about this, her replied was, 'it takes more that that Alang..more than that.  Just mark my words'. 


Now, I've been doing my practicum for almost  2 months.  Yes, she was right.  It takes more than that.  Passion for the language is nothing when you face 8 year old kids who dont even know how to spell LEFT.  Can u share your passion? Its a tough job.


Luckily, I've few new discovery (ies).  Self-discovery.  I just discovered that I do like kids.  Yes,kids. Not just my nieces and nephews.  But its not the same 'like', like everybody else does. Its different brand of like.  To know that they still cannot read at the age of 8, worries me.  To know that they still cannot differentiate between solat asar and subuh, scares me.  Somebody said to me that its good to have that..thats a real teacher thinking.  If you have that you can survive the teaching profession. I dont know.  


What I know is, in whatever profession you cant get involve too much.  The biggest mistake i made when i was a lawyer was, I got involve too much.  I even gave money to the defendant to buy breakfast.  I heard them when I was not suppose to.  That was when things got out of control.  I received call from the defendants more than my clients.  My staff even joke about this..'we are like legal aid bureau now'.  And the final straw was when my boss JOkE about that too..and believe me it sounded more like warning rather than a joke. Enough of that, back to my post.  So, can I survive this profession?  (for at least 5 years?)


I guess we just have to wait and see.  So I wish all the best to ME and also to my frens who are reading this.